whiskey slushes.

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My favorite holiday drink is so easy to make, even you can do it. I am having Thanksgiving with some new friends this year, and I am planning to bribe them with these for affection. Fingers crossed.

You do kind of have to plan ahead, as it involves freezing, and that takes some time. I just made these for Thursday. Also, you need a plastic 2-liter pitcher. A glass one would be too dangerous.

1 can frozen lemonade concentrate
1 can frozen orange juice concentrate
1/2 cup sugar
12 oz whiskey (or more — I’m not your mom)
Sprite

Just pour everything but the Sprite into a pitcher, add water to fill the pitcher, stir, and freeze it. Serve it as 50% slush, 50% Sprite. That’s it.

Pro tip: Use cheap whiskey. I bought a $7 bottle of shitty shit yesterday, but then I accidentally broke it, which is why I used Jack. Don’t waste your good stuff on this, because you can’t taste it anyway.

cheaplazygirl margaritas

I am something of a margarita connoisseur and the first to admit that they are hard to make. I don’t even attempt to make legit margaritas at home. It’s kind of like how I feel about homemade salad — it requires too many ingredients for a single person to keep fresh.

There tends to be a bottle of Skinnygirl margaritas in my fridge. (I don’t like drinking alone, but Gossip Girl kind of requires alcohol at this point. WHY BLAIR WHY.) But if I’m going to a party, bringing four bottles of Bethenny’s stuff is a little expensive, and also a little lame. That’s why I love these easy margaritas for tailgating, BBQs, Tuesdays, or (imagine that) Memorial Day parties.

It’s nothing but equal parts limeade concentrate, tequila, beer, and Sprite. I think you’re technically supposed to use Corona, but nobody cares. The beer I bought for today is Lime Cactus Michelob Ultra, which sounds awful, but I’m sure it will be fine.

Oh good lord, I just looked up reviews for LCMU, and they are not good. I do not understand most of the words these people are using (who knew there were such avid beer snobs?), but there was this gem: “The heavy lime taste masks the traditional Michelob Ultra flavor very well.”

Seriously no one will know the difference.